Ditching Online Dating Apps "brought my life back" | infodesk4n

Dating apps were popular even before the Corona virus outbreak, but they have become even more popular due to crashes in various places.

Tinder, the most downloaded dating app in the world, slipped three billion times a day in March 2020 and has since broken the record multiple times.

While these apps have helped many single people get to know each other over the years, some people have raised questions about the kind of environment they are creating. This is especially important for women as they face far more bullying and harassment than men on these platforms.

"The hardest thing for me was feeling used to free sex," says Sheena Silver. It doesn't feel right and it hurts. "

Sheena Silver is a New York-based author and host of a dating podcast, A Single Serving. They have been using these dating apps for many years. "I was often asked to have sex before Hello. People did it before they gave their names. I was rejected over and over again in this world and it made me feel less important."

These messages are uploaded to these platforms and sent to both men and women. But the percentage of women affected is much higher.

According to data from the Pew Research Center, many women are victims of harassment on dating sites and apps. 57% of women between the ages of 18 and 34 say they were sexually harassed or sent photos they never asked for. The same happens with young women between the ages of 15 and 17 who report having received these kinds of messages.

Some users have reported experiencing stress or even more severe experiences. A 2017 Pew Research Center study found 36% of users found links on these platforms to be extremely annoying. In the 2020 study, women between the ages of 18 and 35 mentioned physical harm. 19% of women complained while 9% of men complained.

Additionally, one study found that heterosexual and bisexual men rarely talk about the dangers associated with these apps.

Nancy Joe, who writes about youth culture, was so obsessed with sales apps that she wrote a book about it. "These things have normalized so quickly that they should never normalize, like unpleasant conversations, physical and mental damage, etc.", she says, but so much is happening that we need to talk about it.

Responsibility

Some systems have been created to solve these problems.

Tinder, for example, has installed a system that detects profanity and asks the writer to reevaluate it. In 2020, Bumble introduced artificial intelligence that blurs images sent and doesn't display images unless the person in front agrees. On some platforms, the user is asked for a selfie to get a real picture of the user. The goal is to prevent people from hiding behind false identities.

Cena Silver says these efforts are important and better than nothing, but they still need to be improved. Many people agree. "We only have one block left," she says. But the problem is, in order to block someone, you have to deal with her bad behavior first.

A big problem is that there is a risk of sexual assault when people meet. Although women are starting to do a lot to avoid this, such as telling friends where they are going before they leave or keeping the phone fully charged, the risk remains.

According to a study, only 6 out of 45 dating apps have tried to stop sex offenders from using their platform. Legislation to that effect was presented to the United States Congress in May 2021.

But there is a downside to US internet law, according to him, websites cannot be held liable if a third party uses their platform to harm another person. This means that in this multi-billion dollar industry, companies cannot be held accountable for preventing their customers from misbehaving.

In the United States there are voices for a revision of the law.

Can things get better?

At the moment, these platforms don't provide much security to users. And many people can make positive connections on these platforms, but users are still at risk.

In addition to legislation and corporate efforts, this social change is needed. Men need to know how their actions affect others. Men rarely understand the effects of their misbehavior.

These attitudes were enough for Sheena Silver. You left the platform almost two years ago. And they don't even think about going back.

"I've never gotten anything good out of them," she says. So why should I keep using them? It may sound a little dramatic, but leaving them brought me back to life.